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Should you ever grab the first offer that your counterpart makes in a negotiation?
The answer is a firm “Never!” if you heed the advice given by a number of other pundits.
The wisdom informing this is that if you gladly accept an initial offer it sends the signal to your counterpart that you probably would have accepted less, if he had ground you down a little.
Instead of being grateful that he made a fast deal, he’ll always kick himself for not offering substantially less as his opening gambit.
As with so many rules of the game, this one has exceptions as I note in my negotiation seminars offered at UCLA and UC Berkeley.
(1) If you’re not dealing with a seasoned negotiator, the first offer he or she makes may be the best you’ll hear. Practiced buyers will come in low and inch their way up based on give and take. But novices will typically throw out their very best offer right away, leaving no room for haggling.
(2) Your counterpart could be telling the truth when he says, “My budget for your speech is only $10,000, plus expenses.” If you invest in trying to get him to budge from that figure, are you tacitly calling him a liar? Negotiation lore propagates the generalization that “buyers are liars,” which is obviously not applicable much of the time.
(3) If there is a downside to seeming eager to do business with someone, by accepting the first offer, there is an upside, as well. You’re saying just that; you’re glad to earn their business. Enthusiasm has been called the highest paid quality in the world, so how can it be the most costly at the same time?
(4) I can look back on some of the very best deals I ever made, and many of them came after I simply said yes.
(5) I can look back on the deals that I’ve blown, that would have made a big difference in my career had I said yes early in the negotiation, but I tried to be too clever, and I outsmarted myself.
You should know your latitudes of acceptance, rejection, and non-commitment going into a negotiation. This means you should have a strong sense of what is a great or a good deal, a minimally acceptable one, and offers you will outright reject.
If the initial bid is in the first latitude, what’s wrong with accepting? Yes, you might leave a few pennies on the table, but a speedy deal also delivers value, cutting substantially your transaction costs and the risk you might alienate your counterpart with “hardball” tactics.
Judge each circumstance carefully, and when it comes to best practices, “Never Say Never!”
Dr. Gary S. Goodman is a top speaker, sales, service, and negotiation consultant, attorney, TV and radio commentator and the best-selling author of 12 books. He conducts his “Best Practices in Negotiation” seminar at UC Berkeley and UCLA Extension, and at corporations and conventions around the world. His new audio program is Nightingale-Conant’s “Crystal Clear Communication: How to Explain Anything Clearly in Speech & Writing.” Gary’s web site is: http://www.customersatisfaction.com and he can be contacted at gary@customersatisfaction.com.
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Many patients want to know more about the physiological roots of their phobic behavior. If you think your phobias are the product of an inner-ear dysfunction, you may have the same concerns. How did you get this dysfunction in the first place? Can it get worse? Can it get better?
As might be expected, many people are born with an inner-ear dysfunction. But this problem can also be acquired in any number of ways throughout the various stages of your life. Let’s examine some of these possibilities.
GENETICALLY ACQUIRED
Inner-ear dysfunction is frequently in the genes, passed down from generation to generation in a faulty genetic blueprint. If you inherited your inner-ear problems, chances are that other members of your family (parents, grandparents, siblings) have similar problems.
Some of your family members may have phobias; maybe even the same ones you have. Some may have different inner-ear-related symptoms. Others may have phobias and other related symptoms. And some fortunate members of your family may have no visible signs of inner-ear dysfunction.
It all depends on the luck of the draw. But if your inner-ear dysfunction was inherited, chances are you will find ample evidence of some inner-ear problems in your family tree, once you know what to look for.
ACQUIRED DURING FETAL DEVELOPMENT
Many factors affect the physiological development of an unborn child. If any of these specifically affect the development of the inner-ear system you may be born with an inner-ear dysfunction, even though it´s not part of your genetic blueprint. These factors, which the pregnant mother may or may not have been aware of, include:
o Toxemia
o Disease states during pregnancy, such as diabetes and various glandular disorders
o Infections during pregnancy
o Drug use or abuse during pregnancy
o Falling or other accidents during pregnancy
o Anoxia during pregnancy, oxygen deprivation from a twisted or wrapped umbilical cord
o Malnutrition
ACQUIRED AT BIRTH
Various complications during delivery can damage a previously healthy inner-ear system, including:
o Premature birth
o Oxygen deprivation (from umbilical cord strangulation during delivery) Fetal “concussions” caused by:
a) improper use of forceps
b) tight birth canal
c) forced labor
d) precipitated birth
ACQUIRED DURING CHILDHOOD OR ADOLESCENCE
Even if you are born with a perfectly healthy inner-ear system, many factors can interfere with its normal development, including:
o Severe or repeated ear infections
o Mononucleosis
o Sinus infections and other illnesses known to affect the inner-ear system Concussion states (from a fall or other accident)
o Whiplash
o Malnutrition
o Allergic or toxic disturbances
o Drug use or abuse
o Various degenerative disorders
o Unusual or prolonged emotional stress Endocrine disorders (hypothyroidism, etc.)
o Surgery or anesthesia
ACQUIRED DURING ADULT LIFE
Regardless of your age, and regardless of how healthy your inner-ear system is, a variety of factors can damage that system at any time. Every item on the preceding list is capable of inflicting this damage. In addition, a healthy inner-ear system can be disrupted by the chemical changes brought on by menopause and by the degenerative effects of old age.
SETTING THE STAGE
As you can see, there are innumerable ways to acquire an inner-ear dysfunction. No wonder this physiological problem is present, to some degree, in more than 20 percent of the population. But regardless of whether you were born with this dysfunction or acquired it at some point in your life, the stage has been set. For once the inner ear is impaired, you are vulnerable to the onset of a vast array of phobias and related symptoms.
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